The Piggyback Fail

Saturday was my good friends Cameron and Leah’s wedding!

They both looked so amazing. I am going to do a full recap, but I want to wait until I have some more pictures (I am hoping to steal some from FBeezy).

In the meantime, I have a story for you.

I was a bridesmaid in the wedding, and my groomsman/partner-in-crime for the day was Woody, a good friend of Cam’s who I have definitely mentioned before.

I was really excited to be paired with Woody because he is tall and sturdy, and I am quite tall as well, so I wouldn’t have to worry about looking like a sasquatch in heels next to my groomsman. Or stumbling down the isle.

Woody and I were talking after the ceremony about our entrance into the reception tent when the wedding party is announced, and obviously we wanted to do something funny and memorable. I suggested piggybacking, and Woody was immediately down and was all “I’ll totally piggyback you!”

But I said no. Not what I meant. I had something else in mind.

happy or hungry

Woody was skeptical. He is 6’4″ and about 260lbs, so not exactly light or aerodynamic. He expressed his doubts, but I was firm. Yeah, it would be kind of funny if he piggybacked me in as we were being announced, but it would be WAY more funny if I piggybacked him. I was already picturing our grand entrance.

But we needed to make sure it was going to work. So we practiced.

And all was well! I was able to channel my inner ant and piggyback his heavy ass. We decided I would piggyback him for about 10 feet or so into the tent, and then he would jump off, walk in front of me, and throw my bouquet back to me. Easy-peasy! And catching the bouquet was honestly my biggest worry leading up to the piggybacking event. I thought it would be pretty embarrassing if I missed.

I wish that’s all that happened, let me tell ya.

The bridal party lined up in front of the entrance to the tent, and Woody and I waited our turn. The groom’s sister Jessica and friend Steve were called ahead of us, and Woody and I watched as they entered the tent and danced around. They were entertaining, for sure, but I knew our piggyback would trump them (sorry guys, just sayin’).

And then it was our turn. We walked together to the entrance of the tent, and when the DJ announced our names, I leaned over in front of Woody and prepared for him to gently ease himself onto my back. I had my game face on.

The eyes of 120 guests were on us. Woody jumped onto my back, and for about two seconds, all was well.

happy or hungry

People cheered. I felt proud.

And then I am not exactly sure what happened.

The piggyback did not go exactly as planned, and that is an understatement and a half… We were on a bit of a slope, and I think that combined with excitement and adrenaline caused Woody to jump onto my back with a bit more force than I was expecting. The momentum caused me to lurch forward, so I stepped in my heels onto the uneven cobblestone in front of me.

I made it about two steps into the tent, and then I face-planted.

And Woody landed directly on top of me.

My right knee took the brunt of the fall, but I did still manage to smash my face off the cobblestones.

Woody was horrified. He immediately jumped off my back and helped me to my feet. I was bleeding profusely from my knee, and a little bit from my face. I think I was in shock, and my thoughts are fuzzy here, but I remember being disappointed that we had failed. I had not managed to piggyback him into the reception. And everyone was watching us.

So I immediately kicked off my heels, leaned over, and said:

happy or hungry

But Woody wouldn’t. He stuck with our initial plan, and walked a few feet ahead of me so he could toss the bouquet back to me. He wound his arm back to get into proper throwing position.

But he didn’t see the server who was suddenly standing behind him, rushing to our attention to make sure I was okay, and…

He hit her with the bouquet square in the face.

And then he threw it to me. And I caught it! (that really would have been embarrassing if I missed, right?!)

Someone told me later that the server getting smashed in the face actually looked worse than my initial fall (I wasn’t really paying attention when it happened). Apparently she had a big welt on her forehead.

By this point, the guests were all dying laughing. I was even dying laughing, and could not stop for about half an hour.

Woody and I made our way to the head table, where a team of servers with a first aid kit immediately came over to fix me up.

I really scraped all the skin off my knee, and it took a while to stop bleeding…

But Woody and I did not let the incident stop us from having a good night!

(Please ignore the spilled drink on my dress. I had a bit of an accident while attempting to ease my pain.)

It was the best wedding entrance ever. We were practically famous!

And face-wise I was extremely lucky. I turned my face at the last second, so I only hit my cheek and my chin (which was a bit swollen). If I had hit my face straight on, I could have re-broken my nose, or possibly lost some teeth! I was also lucky that pictures were already done, and that those cuts were barely noticeable that night. Though by Monday it looked like I got punched in the face. Someone in my work building actually asked me if I did get punched in the face…

The incident was also videotaped from two different angles. The DJ somehow got it on his iPhone from the videographer immediately, and has already asked me if I am okay if it’s on YouTube. So if does end up there, I’ll obviously show you guys. It’s pretty hilarious.

So just a lesson for you ladies. Don’t attempt to piggyback anyone who is 6’4″, 260lbs. It may not work out…

Edit: It seems I am off slightly in my memory of the incident, and I have some of the details wrong. So if you would like to see what REALLY happened, here is the video:

Edit again: Here is the video on Ellen 🙂


62 responses to “The Piggyback Fail

  1. LOL to the “get back on here!” That is so something I would do. At least you made the most memorable entrance, and really…that’s what you were going for. And hot damn, you go to a lot of weddings!
    Oh, and purple is totally your color. Meow!

    • Ohh it is wedding season big time. I am at that age now!
      I’ll say it was a memorable entrance. I don’t think I would change anything about it, except maybe making it a bit further into the tent before falling…

  2. It’s nice that you’re game. I mean. . . girls who are game are the best. Still. . .

  3. You are a champion! WTG!

  4. OMG!!! This made my day! Woody looks huge- i can’t believe you even attempted this!! hahaha.

  5. Oh noooooo! Bahahahaha! I laughed and laughed. And then felt bad. And then laughed some more. Is it bad that I half-wish that you’d missed your catch, just because it would make the story even more cringe-worthy? Ha! Only you, Lindz. Only you.

  6. You’re the most awesome person ever. Honestly. CHAMPION.

  7. You are pretty much the best! Way to take it like a champ. I especially love the cartoons to go along with the story…they totally make any story a million times more awesome!! Glad you turned your face last second!! I’ll remember this next time I’m a bridesmaid haha!

  8. It’s too bad I’m already married, or I would totally ask you to be my bridesmaid.

  9. Oh my gosh! I love that he whapped the server in the face! This is too funny! What did the bride do?

    • The rest of the entrances went as planned, and I felt bad for upstaging the bride and groom. How were they going to top that? Haha. I apologized profusely to them. She was concerned, but when she saw I was okay she died laughing 🙂

  10. Wowww!! It’s all good we all do silly things….at least you were able to laugh about it. Kinda horrifying!! You have some really great drawing skills lady. Oh I have a funny story from this weekend, I was at Wassaga beach on Sunday…got out of the water….dried off and put a dress on why walking to the strip to checkout the stores. I saw a parked car, with big windows and attempted to check my hair out and fix it. Not knowing peeps were in the car LMAO the windows were pitch black. LMAO my friends were dying laughing lol….thank goodness I was not adjusting my bikini top lol

  11. LOL I have been waiting for this to come up since your text!!! Ahhh!! Well, ya took it in stride and I’m sure Woody felt TERRIBLE about it. On the bright side, you looked beautiful, Spoon! Can;t wait to see the pics.

    • Oh he did. He did feel terrible. You should have seen his face. Just SHOCK. And he did a speech about the incident, which was really funny.
      Janet said it was the most graceful fall she had ever seen! I will take that!

  12. OMG!! is it bad that this made me laugh!!!! oh my. glad to hear you’re ok!!!!! lol

  13. OHHHH man that is a goood story! So glad you didn’t land directly on your face! This totally is something that would happen in the movies, especially the part about the person getting hit with the bouquet! I NEED to see that video!! 🙂 Oh and I love your shoes btw… 😉

  14. haha you got your “inner ant on”. died laughing. sooo good.

  15. Funny how those yellow glasses make their big debut in that post you linked from Woody’s cottage. Do you know how many times I’ve lost those things? I didn’t even bring them to the wedding, they just showed up fashionably late and lensless. Man, those glasses know how to party.

  16. WOW..what an entrance! This makes me laugh so hard and your drawings are epic. I would pay good money to see the video, hope it surfaces! Oh and so glad you are OK and did not hit your face very hard, that could have been really bad!

  17. This was so funny and I love the cartoons in with the real stuff. Maybe you do that a lot but it’s the first time I’ve seen it!

  18. Ow! I love that you told him to get back on!

  19. Hahahahahaha!!! Only you! Ps is that the miller lash house???? Im pretty sure it is thats where my wedding is in september!!!!!!

    Lauren (intern ofsaa)

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  21. This is so amazing, it deserves to be tweeted! FB’ed to death! I will proceed to do both, dearie! :))

    Also, this made me laugh, and I don’t mean a MEAN kind of laugh as in… “buahaha…stupid chick…she hurt herself! haha!!” …uh no…more as in… “haha! she’s nuts!! haha!! :)) ”

    So great…hahaha…you poor thing…all things considered, I’m surprised you didn’t break your ankle and face entirely! 😉 Keep up the cartoons! They’re the best ever! :))

  22. Pingback: Bridal Entrance Fail Video | Happy or Hungry

  23. You should piggybacked me. I’m only 145

  24. Omg! I made this super awesome and funny comment and it never posted! Dang! I did write it when I was at the optometrists office though, with drops in my eyes and I couldn’t really see. I wonder who I ended up commenting to….?

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  26. Oh My GODDDDDD this is the most hilarious/amazing thing I have ever seen!!!!! You are going to be famous for this, for sure. You are the only person I know who could look beautiful falling on their face. xo

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  28. Hi Lindsey.

    We are trying to get in touch with you in regards to the video ‘Bridal party entrance fail’ on YouTube. We are a London-based television company called October Films and we are producing a programme for British Network Channel 4 called Rude Tube. The programme celebrates the best online videos today. We are keen to include the video in our programme.

    Would you email me to discuss this in further detail? My email is:

    I look forward to hearing from you soon!

    All the best


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  30. Ughhhhh and I’m supposed to be WORKING and you had to go and have all these cool tabs with BACK posts…..

    Well, now nothing will get done today. I hope you’re happy that you have ruined productivity for all time. Or at least until lunch.

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  36. Hahaha! I’m so glad you caught that bouquet – it would have been humiliating if you’d missed it. Your story is hilarious, your illustrations are genius, and I am now a huge fan. 🙂

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  44. awwww what a crack up read the effort put in to it to be an epic fail but life should be fun may i ask for the name of youtube vid as i would like to see that wedding fails are the best because every1s watching lol p.s the cartoon strip to this one is the best lol

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