Some random search terms for ya

I didn’t do anything all that blog-worthy this weekend, and I’m not done my cartoon post, so to keep you interested so you don’t abandon me, I’m going to do some random Google search terms that have led people here over the past week. These always make me laugh. People search for the most ridiculous things. So if you have been looking for any of these things, allow me to help you out.

how to make flyers for babysitting

This is how:

You just need some multi-coloured markers and you are good to go. It’s important to specify exactly how old you are, because 12 and three quarters sounds infinitely more mature than just 12. Also, if you have experience with newborns, I suggest you include that. This demonstrates how responsible you are.

I would suggest picking a price point though, because “you pick the price to pay” may get you paid in chocolate bars. Not a bad thing, but we were actually looking to make money.

I got at least 20 babysitting jobs from those bad boys, so trust me. They work.

fell from tree cartoon

Here ya go:

Don’t you steal that without crediting me though, or I will hunt you down.

cat lion haircut

My friend Catherine did this, and her cat looks awesome.

It may seem inhumane, but Catherine assured me this is an actual haircut from the groomers. And her cat likes it.

shamed cat

This is the face of a shamed cat.

Poor little Winnie. It worked though! She has been less annoying lately at night. It was obviously because she got shamed.

creepy danny tanner

Oh I’ll give you creepy Danny Tanner

It doesn’t get much creepier than the Danny Tanner doll.

Or the Uncle Jesse and Michelle dolls…

Creeeeepy.

danny tanner clouds

I completely forgot about this picture until I saw this search term pop up.

This used to make me laugh so hard. What a dream.

how to take a picture in the bathroom mirror

Ugh, just…don’t. But if you must, rope someone’s grandma into joining you.

Maybe she will step it up and flip the mirror the bird. Grandmas are the best.

jtt, called and said it was jtt

Did he actually?! Or was it just your stupid neighbour playing a prank on you? If JTT actually called you, please email me and tell me your story! I also hope he was wearing that exact outfit while he rang you up.

how to part your hair so you don’t look like you have a conehead

I don’t really have advice for this. I say embrace your conehead if you have a conehead.

And cute workout headbands are probably not going to be for you, because they will just slide right off.

the green mile bad guy

Ughhhh. PERCY.

He is so greasy and creepy in both the Green Mile and real life with his 17-year-old wife. Just looking at his face makes me feel sick.

buck teeth and glasses

I was an attractive child.

longest beard in the world 2012

This beard is actually called the World’s Longest Beard, so I am going to assume the name does not lie.

justin bieber has my birthday

He has mine too!

He is such a birthday stealer!

And that is all. Here are some past random search term posts:

7 responses to “Some random search terms for ya

  1. I’m amazed that your search results have zero creepy entries. Cat lion makes me want to go buy a cat and groom him into a lion. Even though I’m allergic. Do they let you have cats for a day?

    • I don’t get TOO many creepy searches. Probably because I don’t write about creepy things, as you do.
      You can probably have a cat for a day. But apparently you cannot adopt a black cat in October from the humane society, or they will assume you only want the cat for Halloween. This has happened to me…

      • creepy things? What creepy things do *I* write about???

        Honestly though I don’t get creepy OR interesting searches. They’re all pretty much on point. It makes for lame “searches that found my blog” blogs. Like. . . “Social stories for autistic kids going to kindergarten” or “Target post”. . . ridiculous.

  2. I’m attracted to the peace sign necklace on JTT. I can see why he was everyone’s dreamboat in 1994. I’m actually strangely attracted to him right now…even though I’m 57 years old. Is that OK?

  3. Love this so much! I post google searches every few months. It’s almost time to do it again. So entertaining. The conehead is a good look for you, really.

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