One Year Ago Today

I met Evan. Today is the anniversary of our first date.

Of course I have talked about this before, and you may already know the details. Or some of the details, at least. But, my friends, you don’t know the story. I am not sure I even know the story, or if there is even a story. I have never typed it out. But I am feeling all nostalgic and romantic, and I think it is good to have a record of the important moments in your life. So gather round and settle in for a little love story. Maybe make yourself a drink. I have a sneaking suspicion that it is going to get quite rambley, but we’re talking about love here so that is okay.

The Meeting

And so, one year ago today I met Evan. Well actually, I “met” him about one year and one week ago, online, on OKCupid.com. I had taken a little break from the whole online dating thing, as I wasn’t having great experiences (but that’s a whole other story…that I obviously blogged aboutseveral times), but one night in mid-December last year I was feeling a little lonely, so on a whim I signed back up (but on a different dating site, I was originally using Plenty of Fish, but both POF and OKC are free so I guess of the same calibre). I was slightly skeptical of online dating at that point, and pretty wary of anyone who messaged me. I was putting the photos of the guys who had messaged me into Google image search (note to online daters: this is VERY IMPORTANT!) and in the mix of guys who contacted me I found an ex hockey player (for the Edmonton Oilers), a European soccer player (who was also a model), and Hayden Christensen.

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Pretty sure Hayden Christensen was not actually messaging me on an online dating site.

So, needless to say, I wasn’t feeling confident about my luck online.

But… one of the people to message me within the first day of my re-sign up, right before I threw in the towel again, was Evan. And I don’t want to get all cliché and cheesy, but he really did write me the perfect “I’m breaking the ice here” note and just piqued my interest immediately. In my profile I had written, amongst other things, that I very much liked proper spelling and grammar, and if you wrote me a message that said “your beautiful” (my beautiful WHAT?) I would probably not respond. And Evan ended his first message to me with a simple:

“Oh, and also, you’re beautiful. See, I know my stuff.”

And while that may not seem like anything significant, for me I took that to mean that he knew his stuff spelling and grammar-wise, and also that he knew his stuff beauty-wise. So I liked that. And when I went over to check out his profile, I really liked what he had written there (in immaculate grammar and spelling), and I actually read every word before even looking at his pictures. And when I did look at his pictures, I saw this one:

meandrooster

And I wasn’t entirely sure what was going on in this photo (is that a chicken?), but I’m also not entirely sure how you say no to that cheeky face. I wanted to talk to him. (I need to note here that I told Evan last night that I NEEDED to have this photo but I could not tell him the reason why because he doesn’t know I’m writing this, and he searched for it for me for an entire hour and even broke out his way old laptop to eventually find it. That man just delivers, I tell you.)

So anyway, I responded. I don’t remember what I said, but we were quickly having novel conversations within the online dating messaging thing, and within a few days or so we took our online talking to texting. And you may think texting is unromantic or whatever and be of the mindset that the guy should always call the girl, but I personally would rather text. I really dislike talking on the phone, even with my very best friends. I feel like I have a hard time reading people if I can’t see their facial expressions and I am thrown off by tone of voice alone. In-person communication is my favourite, but texting is second best to me, because I love to write and I can read what you text me and interpret it however I want.

Anyway, I’m digressing (I’m sure that will be a theme here). Moving on. After about a week we decided we should probably meet up in person and just sorta see what happened. This was the week before the Christmas holidays, and I had three Christmas parties to attend, as well as my work’s Christmas cookie exchange (and I was making my Nana’s shortbread cookies which are VERY time consuming), so it was a really, really busy time. But Evan was going to be away for at least a week over the holidays and I had a bunch of festive things happening as well, so I knew I had to squeeze him in. We didn’t even have time for dinner, but we met for a drink around 9pm on a Tuesday evening. It couldn’t be late, we both had to work the next day, but we just needed to meet and get it out of the way to see…I don’t even know what. That we both existed? We were who we said we were? In-person chemistry? I don’t know. But we had to see.

The First Date

It was awkward at first, as all first dates are. I don’t think there is any way to get around that. We met in the middle of the street (at the corner of Yonge and Davisville, my old ‘hood) all bundled up in our winter coats and our scarves and our mitts and our hats and just kind of awkwardly patted each other on the shoulder in greeting and then decided that maybe we should hug. Again, bulky and awkward. But it didn’t feel creepy or anything, so that’s a good sign.

We walked to a pub (the Twisted Kilt, which has sadly since changed its name) on Yonge between Eglinton and Davisville.

Once we sat down, the conversation was easy. I can barely remember what we talked about, but I do I remember that we did not stop talking, and everything seemed to flow very naturally. Before I knew it, it was 11 and I had to leave if I didn’t want to be a zombie the next day. We walked together to the corner where we had originally met, arm in arm, and Evan being the gentleman that he is offered to walk me to my door but I was STILL a little wary because of the whole online thing, even though I knew he wasn’t a creepy stalker… So I declined. But I appreciated the offer, very much. And we hugged goodbye, just a standard hug. But Evan told me later that he THOUGHT I might like him because before I walked away I put my hand on his side (more accurately, on the side of his bulky coat) and let it linger there for a minute while I stood there and just smiled at him. I don’t remember this, but I guess sub-consciously I wanted to touch him? I feel like it is one of those Cosmo articles “How To Show Him You Like Him” – touch your hair, your collarbone, let your hand rest on his thigh… I know you know the article. Well I guess it’s legit!

First Date Aftermath

After our first date, I did not see him next for nearly two weeks. Christmas things, you know! But during that time we texted constantly. Really, a lot. Especially at night as we were going to bed. Probably to an annoying amount for anyone who knows me. I spent Christmas day with my good friend Sherrie watching Love Actually and Scrooged in our Pajamas and I kept getting texts from Evan and Sherrie saw his name come up on my phone and was all “Who is this Evan?!” and I didn’t know what to tell her! Of course I was honest and said it was someone who I had met online and had been on one date with, and so far so good and fingers crossed and all that… I played it off as pretty casual. But at that point I already felt like Evan was a game changer, I just didn’t know how to convey to anyone yet that he was a “person of interest”.

I think it was the week and a half between our first and second date that solidified things in my mind. We talked so much during that time that when I saw him again I felt like I knew him so well and we were just…on our way. I don’t know what else to say or how else to describe it. I felt comfortable and Evan felt familiar.

The Second Boozy Date

For our second date, we met downtown at the Tim Hortons at College Station and Evan brought his own little bottle of Kahula to sneakily spike our coffees. A surprise that won me over even further (perhaps some people would disagree and say bringing your own booze on your second date isn’t a great sign, but I really liked it and I thought it was thoughtful). He told me nothing of what we were doing. He just told me where to meet him and what time and that he would take care of the rest. I was intrigued but I figured we were just going bowling or something.

Nope. No bowling. After he sneakily spiked our coffees we took the street car to Allan Gardens, a huge greenhouse in Toronto. I had never been there before, but I was surprised at how big it was. It was almost tropical inside and it felt great to get rid of our jackets and winter apparel and walk around with our spiked coffees and look at all the plants and flowers as we talked.

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allan-gardens

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Tres romantique. It was the most awesome and thoughtful date that I have ever been on. I thought it was so original. Way better than bowling. He also took me out for dinner to the 3 Brewers afterwards, a local brewery, which is not a fancy restaurant by any means but for me it was really perfect, as I love beer, and we got to try all the different kinds. It was a dream date, for sure.

Annnd we had our first kiss on the way home. All obnoxiously on the subway. If I didn’t know us and I saw us, I may have hated us. We were standing inside one of the door areas and I was so impressed and I thought he was so awesome and I just couldn’t handle it anymore so I just went for it. And it was awkward but nice, and then my giant purse slipped off my shoulder and brought the entire right side of my body down and that was the end of it. And that made us laugh hard.

And then…were we official?

We both deleted our profiles shortly after the second date. Which was funny actually because OKCupid asks for the reason of your profile deletion, and I just said I met someone offline because if you check online it asks for their username. I didn’t want to put in Evan’s username in case he got a notification or something, or a message saying “HEY! Lindsey is deleting her profile because she thinks you’re dating. IS THIS TRUE?!” but then when we talked about it later, Evan said he that he did actually check off that he met someone online and he put in my username… I guess he got shafted.

Before I left for Jamaica I wanted to make sure we were on the same page, so it was me who made the first move official-wise. Actually, I think I am very impatient and hate not knowing things, so I just made the first move to get it out of the way. I remember we were at my place hanging around and I was all “Soo…are you seeing anyone else?” even though I 100% knew he was not. And he confirmed and said he was not. And I said “Soo…do you maybe want to be my boyfriend?” all juvenille-like. I may as well passed him a note that said “Will you be my boyfriend? Check Yes, No or Maybe.”

A coworker of mine was asking me about this the other day and I told her that I was the one who essentially asked Evan to be my boyfriend, and she said “Oh, you must not have liked him very much then, if you were the one who asked. You wouldn’t have cared if he rejected you,” but that is not the case AT ALL. I asked because I already knew. I knew he was as into me as I was into him, I just wanted to make sure we both knew. I feel like it is important to be up front and honest and NOT play games. If you like someone, tell them. I’m not a fan of dicking around.

Anyway, he said yes, and now we live together, and happily ever after, and all that.

Our first photo together:

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I have already raved on about how Evan is the best ever. But know that I think every day that I could easily add something to that list. He is SO thoughtful and he pays attention to the smallest details…IN THE BEST WAY. I don’t think I have ever known anyone to notice and appreciate all the things about me the way he does. He goes out of his way to make my life easier. He is the most supportive person I have ever encountered. He is always a step ahead of me. It’s like he knows I need something before I even know that I need it.

I just feel so overwhelmingly thankful that he found me on OKCupid and messaged me what he did and that I wrote back. Because otherwise I don’t think I could have met him. I doubt our paths would ever cross. And I am really trying not to get too cheesy, but he is 100% the best thing that has ever happened to me and I don’t think I could have even imagined someone who is as amazing as him.

I know that in the grand scheme of life one year isn’t a very long time, but maaaan has this year dragged on. Just kidding. It has gone by very quickly, and it has been amazing. I already cannot remember a time when Evan was not in my life. It’s good times. It is very good times.

Soo, how to end this?

The End.

Yes.

How did you meet your significant other? I want to hear your loooove stories!

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51 responses to “One Year Ago Today

  1. So cute! We met through a mutual friend one night. Then a year and a half later saw each other at an event and reconnected. We did a lot of Facebook-ing back and forth and we went out for drinks. I didn’t even want to go, but my then roommate said “Just go for free drinks!”…so I went. He kissed me and that was it! We’ve been together ever since. That was March 2009. We never had the “Are you seeing anybody else?/Will you be my boyfriend?” conversation, we just kept seeing each other and one day he called me his girlfriend.

  2. Oh my gosh Lindsey I just love this! And you and I are so much alike once again. The sneaky booze to spike the coffee would have sealed the deal for me too (ha!)
    Torrance and I don’t really have a cool story. We met when I was in 7th grade (he was in 8th) through a mutual friend and we actually “dated” at that time (ya know, like hold hands and walk each other to class, sit together at lunch – and it lasted like 2 months, haha) but I just remember he was SO cute. He had braces and he was all small and just adorable.
    And then we pretty much never talked again after we “broke up” and then fast forward to 2 years later when I was in 9th grade I just randomly was going back to class from the bathroom and he was sitting in the hallway because he got kicked out of class (typical!) and I stopped to talk to him for a while (he was kind of shyish so I had to initiate that) but after talking for 5 minutes he asked if he could have my phone number and then we talked like every night on the phone the next week and did a little texting (that was before cool phones and before texting was super popular… I mean we had the giant Nokia brick phones with antennas on the top, no colored screens!! HAHA) and we just kind of became a thing… and have been together ever since – almost 11 years later! Who woulda thought!

    • What are you talking about you don’t have a cool story? You have an awesome story! I love your story! I especially love that you dated in 7th Grade and you liked his smallness and braces 🙂 And yes I remember “dating” at that age quite well.

      Evan is a little more shy than me also, which is why I initiated the “what’s our status, are you my boyfriend?” convo, because it would have taken him longer and I needed to KNOW.

      So in closing, I think you have the best story. But also, all love stories are just awesome.

  3. http://goo.gl/JY8rpQ

    I actually asked Luke to be my “manfriend” as well after we went to a comedy club. : ) “Do you want to be my manfriend?” Yes, I am pretty sure that is how it went.

  4. I LOVE you guys. While I have heard this story in pieces, it is nice to have the full she-bang up there. Such romance! My favourite picture is the one you first showed me and Heather. We DIED for him, basically. Just had the nicest face ever. Cheers to many more lovering years!

  5. omg LOVE this. And I think all the random quirky things are what make your love story special. Because maybe they wouldn’t have worked on anybody else, but they worked on YOU!
    My husband actually found my old blog. He saw we lived in the same area, so he emailed me to see if I wanted to meet up for coffee. I had no pics of me on my blog so he had no idea what I looked like. We met up for coffee and didn’t think much of it–I was like, “oh maybe he will introduce me to some of his guy friends!” Well, long story short, we continued to hang out, finally started officially dating a month later, and we got married about four months after that first coffee meet-up. No joke. That was four years ago. And I still think he is the best thing that ever happened to me : ) But shh, don’t tell him I said that. I like to keep it on the DL

    • I 100% agree with you. I think every love story is special because of those little details that are really only important to the people they involve.
      You and your husband have such a unique story. I cannot believe how quickly you got married, but hey, when you know you know! And I never understood that phrase before…

  6. I met my hubby at the front door of his parent’s house. He had just come home from spring session at Western and friends I was going to university with in our home town invited me to a party at his house. I hit on him for a week after that and he had NO CLUE! Finally, he figured it out and we’ve been together for 25 years now…and will be celebrating our 20th wedding anniversary in August 2014! Man, time flies!

  7. You story sounds so much like mine. We met online also and I feel like I also knew that he was a “game changer” within the first couple dates. We have been together a little over a year and a half and are now engaged and getting married next June! Love the love stories!! Happy Anniversary!!

  8. I met mine on the internet. That is kind of hard to explain when people ask isn’t it? I always felt weird that I couldn’t find a girlfriend the normal way..

  9. I love this! I never, ever comment on blogs (I am a lifelong lurker and have been reading for years) but it just made me so happy for you to read this. I feel the exact same way about my fiance, and am always sappily telling him how I can’t believe how much I love him and how I find something new to love about him every single day. It is such an amazing feeling that I never thought I would have, and I am so happy for you :). We met three years ago at a “Talk like a pirate day” party. He was the only one dressed up in full pirate garb, he asked me to be his beer pong partner, and the rest is history!

    • Sorry about the mess at the end! My computer was giving me a hard time and wouldn’t let me edit

      • I caught that and took it out for you, no worries. It always bugs me that you can’t edit your own comment when you make a typo. And I LOVE your story and I want to write a better response to your first comment later!

    • I feel kind of honoured that I lured you into commenting!
      It really is an amazing feeling, and I never thought I would have it either. And I have never heard of a “talk like a pirate” party, but now I kind of want to host one. Pirates + beer pong is a pretty good story to tell your grandchildren.

  10. Happy anniversary! It’s actually my 5 year anniversary today too so twinsies 🙂 We met volunteering at university.

  11. My friend dragged me out on one the first nights of summer vacation. When I say I didn’t want to go, I reallly didn’t want to go. But she promised lots of cheap drinks and dancing so I begrudgingly agreed. As the night went on I started to feel good, and then from across the bar I saw this tall, I am talking 6’4, boy (yes, he was only 21, and I was 22, so he was just boy), and I leaned over to my friend and said “i’m going to make that one mine!” I walked over to him and lean over and said the first thing i could think of “I like your jeans.” Whaaa?!? that was my pick up line?! I was so embarrassed. But it worked. We talked and danced and I felt the chemistry right away. (side story, toward the end of the night, i bought him a beer, which he gave to his friend in front of me! I was so confused, but later found out that he didn’t want to drink it and run the risk of embarrassing himself, haha) We have seen each other every day for the past six years. We were married on 9-1-13, and I thank God everyday that he made my friend drag me out. Who knows, I may have missed Michael if I stayed home in my PJs! Cheers to you and Evan, may you have many more years of happiness!

  12. Awwww….this has me feeling all sentimental. I was in a pit of despair, convinced I was unlovable and was going to die alone. My friend told me to go on POF, not to meet anyone, but for a self-esteem boost. So I went in with that as my plan.

    I went on one date with this fellow. I was not expecting anything. But strangely enough I wanted a second date (I never want second dates!). And a third date. And so on and so forth.

    He asked me to be his girlfriend in the sweetest way. He gave me a box and it was filled with items from our dates (a mini pumpkin from pumpkin carving, business card of where we went for dinner, etc). And a notebook. He wrote a story in the book about his perspective of what it’s been like to date me. The story ends half way through the book with him asking me to be his girlfriend and write a novel with him. Obviously said yes.

    I love him so much.

  13. I met my now fiance on OKCupid too.. and i TOTALLY didn’t check the “met someone online” when I deleted my account because I was worried about the same thing! Too funny. Glad to know they don’t check up on those things. Evan seems like the coolest guy ever and even though I don’t know you, it makes me so happy that you guys are in love!

  14. I met my -now husband- about 12 years ago on the web but it wasn’t really a dating site, it was a rate my picture site, I know : how ridiculous! We were young and internet was just starting (ICQ anyone?!). We met each other in person and vaguely went out together. But, we were so young (and he was) immature, it ended up quickly. We lost touch up completely, until facebook reunited us -at the beginning of facebook when everyone was adding everyone-. At that point, we both added each other out of curiosity, but we did not exchange any words. Plus facebook made it clear that we were both in relationships. A few years later I ended up been single. He then messaged me. I was very defensive at first. At the end it took him 6 months of been very patient before we were “officially” a couple. We now are married (since the end of August of this year) and… I’m pregnant. Looking back only a few years ago, someone would have told me that this would happen and I would have never believed it. That’s what makes life interesting, the surprising things!

    Now please do not judge me by my mistakes!! English is NOT my first language! 

    • Ohhh was it Hot or Not?! I believe that was around the ICQ days. I met a guy off there once, and I was so embarrassed that I told my friends we had met in a grocery store because I didn’t want them to know I actually met him online. Not that it went anywhere.
      The surprising things make life the best, for sure. Congrats on your wedding, and your pregnancy! Things are about to get pretty exciting for you.
      And no judgment here.

      • It was Do you look good, which was a very French website despite the name! I’m sure -if those sites still exist- that they are now submerged with douche pictures taken in the mirror of big boobs and big muscles. I swear it was different back then! Lol

  15. I met my husband by dating his roommate. I was have what I now call a “summer of debauchery”. I was going finishing my thesis at school in the fall and didn’t want any responsibilities. So I ended up dating this very charismatic “bad boy”. This guy had tons of tattoos and would crack a beer in the morning. Well, once I went back to school he lost the charisma. At the same time he was losing his charisma with his roommate, my now husband. There were several reasons for this, but one major factor was that he stopped paying rent. So at the same time I broke up with this guy and my husband kicked him out. I stayed friends with everyone else in this house and after a few months of being friends with my now husband we started dating and the rest is history.

    Amazing how we meet our partners!

    • Haha. I can reallllly relate to this. And it really is amazing how we meet our partners! If I hadn’t encountered the guy who didn’t exist on POF, I wouldn’t have taken an online dating break, and I wouldn’t have changed dating sites to OKC, so I probably wouldn’t have met Evan. It is really weird how things are all connected. It just makes me very, very thankful everything happened the way it did.

  16. What a great story!!! My son is Evan, age 9 and my daughter is Lindsay, age 6. I met my husband in 6th grade but we did not start dating until we were out of college for 3 yrs. We have been married for 11 years now.

  17. I rarely post, but I LOVE LOVE LOVE this. I can’t believe I’ve been reading you for over a year (when you had that crazy online fake guy story). Your story gives me so much hope. Happy anniversary of you first date. You’re lucky to have found him, as he is to have found you.

  18. Such a lovely story! You give me hope for online dating. I tried it a few months ago. Went on a few dates. Then met someone on there I dated for a couple of months that turned out to be a toady liar. But maybe I should give it a go again.

  19. This post gives me hope, thank you.

  20. I never comment on blogs, but I love reading yours, and you just seem so very very happy, so here I am commenting! I met my husband in frosh week at university and never thought of him as love material. One night in third year my girlfriends dragged me to the bar, then left early (typical …), so I headed over to get drunk pizza with my now husband (he kept trying to shove donair pizza in my face … I am a vegetarian … so romantic). I then thought it would be a great idea to ask him to watch a movie together because I wasn’t tired, truly having no idea how SCANDALOUS that sounded. Anyway, I went to his house, realized maybe he WAS love material, we kissed, I told him not to tell anyone, but then by the next day I realized he was most likely going to be the love of my life, forever and ever. The end!

  21. I love when you talk about Evan. Your enthusiasm and positivity and love for him is awesome.

    I met my husband online in 2006. We were both into cars and posted on an Audi forum. We randomly started talking on Yahoo messenger while he was on a deployment in Afghanistan. We talked for YEARS (literally, 4) before we decided to stop wasting time and meet up. I bought him a one way ticket from St. Louis to Detroit and he… just never left… I briefly considered that I was getting scammed and/or murdered, but taking the chance on him was the best thing I’ve ever done. I didn’t tell people the full story for ages but so many people are meeting online these days, I no longer feel like a psycho.

  22. Aww, I love your story so much! I have followed your blog for a couple years so I feel like I know you and it just makes me smile when I see pics of you looking so happy with Evan. He seems like such a wonderful and caring person! You were meant for each other!

    My love story is very similar to yours! I met my hubby through Yahoo Personals back in 2006. I KNEW after our first date that he was a game changer so I completely understand what you mean about just knowing! I just knew that first date that he was a REAL and sincere man. Plus I met his parents (my in-laws now!) on our first date. (Long story but true!)

    I am just so happy for you. I know I am jumping the gun here but I cannot wait to see your wedding pics and pics of you babies one day!

  23. I met my manfriend on OKC too!
    Hahaha… I’m a wee bit commitment shy and the first time he said I love you we were in bed. I said I love you too back but was soooo uncomfortable that I got up out of bed and went to watch Harry Potter.

  24. You two are adorable!! I met my husband when I was in high school and we both were working at the same grocery store. I thought he was super cute and he knew it. So he asked me for my phone number. 20.5 years later (13 married) we are still going strong.

  25. I love your love!!
    I met my hunk at work. He told me the first day I started the job, he was asking around who I was cuz he thought I was cute. We both had other S/Os. That did not last long. 🙂

  26. Hi Lindsay,

    I found your blog through your story about the internet creeper and kept reading because- sorry, maybe this is creepy? I am from the GTA and although I was living in Kingston last year, I now live in Toronto and love reading about the adventures other Torontonians have. And also, I thought your blog was relatable and entertaining. So I’ve been lurking for awhile but this is my first post because I met my boyfriend around the same time last year and my experience was very similar- we met on OKC, I fell for his impeccable spelling and grammar, and when we finally met in person it felt like we’d known each other for a long time. We took a little longer to reach “official” status due to the long distance thing so we’ll be celebrating our one year milestone in two weeks! I hope we’re as cute and awesome together as you and Evan seem to be. After the bullshit you went through last year, you deserve a fantastic guy.

    • Thank you so much for your comment. I meant to respond right away, so I am sorry for the delay. Not creepy at all! I love reading about Torontonian adventures as well, so I totally understand.
      I wish you and your online lover all the best 🙂 Happy one year!!!

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